As summer quavers to an end and midterm election campaigns slither into gear, Saddam Hussein is getting more attention than any candidate could dream of, courtesy of the Bush Administration’s chief political media pimp and hatchet man, Karl Rove. The last thing Bush & Co. needs now is to hand over the reigns of the House of Reps to the Democrats, who also stand a chance at shoring up a more substantial majority in the Senate. But as the economy continues to falter in a volatile shitstorm fueled by corporate scandals, Bush & Co.’s intimate ties to Big Business could turn out to be the political money shot for the Dems.
So Rove has been fast at work fondling the warmonger knobs like a pedophile gone wild in an overcrowded postnatal nursery. He’s yanking as many chains as he can to divert attention from the economy and get everyone riled up for the unprovoked initiation of Desert Storm redux. And by all accounts, he’s been somewhat successful.
Video clips of Saddam have been rolling continually on all the major news networks. In most of the footage, he appears to be merely ambling around his palace or having a relaxed chat on the phone with his masseuse about which scented oils he’ll want her to bring to their next session, but then puppet-goons like MSNBC’s Curtis Sliwa and Fox’s Sean Hannity chime in over the video with script that has trickled down from the Rove playbook…
"Saddam is the most rabid threat to all freedom lovers and must be stopped at all costs."
"Hussein’s a plague worse than Hitler. If not dealt with immediately, he will likely succeed in his crusade to afflict the world with weapons of mass destruction."
"He’s such a vile and cancerous threat to the heart of humankind, the antichrist is jealous of him."
Well, maybe so. Hussein does have some lofty aspirations regarding exerting his influence over others, but so does some camel-fluffer named Osama bin Laden, and he’s still romping around in the Hindu Kush, crooning and musing and prancing in the shadows from location to location like a cackling jackal who’s so high on lust for godly status that he’s lost all regard for personal hygiene. And Osama and Saddam aren’t the only ones with queer domineering notions. There are unstable dictators all over the world who already have access to terrorist initiatives and weapons that could reek global havoc--from the Palestinian Authority’s pus-eyed Yasser Arafat and Libya’s wormy-hared Khadafy, to Pakistan’s flighty General Musharraf. Considering all this, some ancient wisdom about the positioning of a horse and a cart comes to mind, but wisdom is usually compromised when it comes to the matter of appeasing the Bush Administration…or Allah for that matter.
"Exterminate all the Brutes!"
That’s the only maxim that counts to those that can muster up the means to arrange it. It’s a line from Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness, and it has less to do with Justice than achieving Vengeance and Dominance at all costs.
The Democrats found this out in the last presidential election, when Rove and a cabal of oil dynasty blue-bloods sought to avenge George H.W. Bush’s loss to Bill Clinton eight years prior by pulling out all the stops for George JR’s 2000 presidential bid. But somewhere along the line, George JR’s bumbling and soulless detachment cost them a win beyond a questionable margin. So when it came time for the post-election battle for Florida, Bush & Co. reached into their bottomless pockets and put a fiscal cap in the ass of the Gore team, outspending them four to one. And the four to one ratio doesn’t delve into all the corporate favoritism that Bush & Co. tried to palm into their side pockets (e.g. While Ted Olson, their lead council, was being chauffeured between Houston and D.C. and Tallahassee on Enron’s private jets, David Boise, the point-man for Gore’s legal team, had to brood around in airport Sbarros while he waited for standby coach seats to Florida on Spirit Airlines’ flights--flights with so many layovers they’re known as the yo-yo routes.) Any attorney worth his nuts will tell you that if you go up against those kind of funding odds you will be beaten like a cheap thrift-store rug after it’s been trampled by a swarm of polo ponies with dung-caked hooves.
But humans are beaten and mauled and stomped everyday, all around the world…and usually in much more physical ways for much dumber reasons:
-A few days ago, in the Catskills, a five-month-old infant had her skull gnawed into by a black bear. Apparently, the bear swiped the child right out of its stroller and bit into its head meat as if it were a slab of liverwurst the animal had discovered in a picnic basket.
-Al Qada recently leaked a bunch of its terrorist trainee videos to CNN. Some of the tapes show Al Qada operatives administering a deadly nerve gas to puppies, who quickly lost all muscle control and keeled over into cardiac arrest.
-The Fox News Channel spits out a child abduction/ molestation/homicide story every hour on the hour…upping the ante of last year’s shark attack theme with what used to be the mainstay of the cardboard milk container.
-And last week, ABC reported that a respected tribunal in the Punjab province of Pakistan ordered Mukhtaran Bibi, a 30-year-old woman from the impoverished village of Mirwali, to be gang raped as punishment for her 12-year-old brother’s alleged affair with a woman from another affluent tribe. Shortly after the verdict was handed down, Bibi was repeatedly sodomized and multiply penetrated in front of a mob of cheering men, and then she was forced to walk through the village naked.
Rape is a taboo in most cultures, but not all. And as far as Pakistani tribal justice is concerned, it’s as traditional as a spicy dish of their homeland’s goat curry. Indeed, some get battered, some get butchered, some get poisoned, some get sexually decimated, and the rest of us are fed these headlines as a warning for what might happen to us next. But not everyone is horrified by such possibilities. Yacht and country clubs are filled with oil and energy CEO’s who laugh at the thought of ever experiencing similar events, just as they laugh at any thought of criminal charges they’ll ever have to face.
Karl Rove is an honored guest at some of America’s finest private clubs, where he schemes up his media coups in the cigar-soothed company of the good ole boys. A star graduate of Richard Nixon’s School of Dirty Tricks, Rove is damn good at what he does. And if he keeps the American ship on his course, it won't be much longer before he has everyone on it convinced it’s imperative to conquer the whole Middle East and reestablish it as a subsidiary U.S. territory that’ll be controlled by Enron. Which is fine by me, because I just bought up a tanker-load of ENRNQ stock for a handful of Canadian pennies…and the only thing it’s safe to do these days is hole up in the basement and pray for the stock market to rise again.
--August 21, 2002